October 2008 - October 2009, A year in Melvin's Life

October 2008
It was time for my afternoon Starbucks break and also cruise some hot security guards in the world headquarters of the Fortune 500 firm I have worked at. My window cube was on the 42nd floor with a spectacular view overlooking the Empire State Bldg and downtown Manhattan. I just sent my coworker/friend Maria a msg saying let’s get coffee. She asked me to come by her office, she had one last thing and we can head down. As I stood up, I got a call and noticed it was from a floor I rarely frequent. Normally, I would send it to voicemail but figured I should answer it. It was my manager and he asked that I pass by. My manager was one of the coolest, smartest, laid-back lads (he’s English) and his tone sort of scared me. Unsure of what I did wrong, besides not working much (the economy cut our client based substantially), I headed to the unexplored floor. Lately, there were a lot of consultants on the “beach” (a term used by many consulting firms). I knew it wasn’t good and was certain I was going to be placed on some sort of probation (firms in NYC can’t just fire you, but would place u on probation and then fire you), and since it was out of my control I was like, ok let’s get this over with quickly.

I opened the conference room door and saw the head of global HR and knew F*C*U*K, what did I do? I looked at my manager and he looked pissed, then he began talking straight out of some manual and I felt a tone of disgust from his voice. I knew he didn’t want to say what he was about to say and then the magical words were said, “you are part of….restructuring….your compensation….”. My heart completely stopped. I was now part of (at that point) 1,000’s that were affected by the fall of Lehman (one of our biggest clients). Then the global head of HR gave his speech and unfortunately (for my readers) that info is confidential but left me in tears (if you’re reading this, I am deeply touched/surprised by the positive words you used).

The meeting was over and I headed to Maria’s office and said, I’m just going home. It was mid-October and I was basically told that I’m still active ‘til November 15, 2008 and can choose to physically come in or not. Now I don’t have anything against my firm and loved most of time there but once the round 1 lay-off notices came out, the office was just a big negative bubble. I was one of less than a handful that decided to come in the day after.
Oh yeah and they gave me a sizeable $$$ and covered health insurance for the next few months.

November 2008
I used a few weeks of my paid-time off to visit business schools in the east coast. My applications were all due early January. By the end of November I was all packed and moved half my stuff to Kate’s apartment (thanks Kate!) and other half back to Miami. I was in Miami in time for Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving, the one time of the year we all get together as a family and give thanks to life/love/health. This Thanksgiving was the first Thanksgiving our family was not together. I lost my uncle (who raised me and I called Dad) to an unexpected lung collapse. So as you can imagine, it was a crying’fest at the table and I’ll leave it at that.

December 2008
After a week in Miami, I knew I could not concentrate on my apps and made a call to San Francisco. My good friend Dewon was going home for the holidays and I asked if I can “house-sit”. With no hesitations, he offered and I was on a one way ticket to San Francisco. My time there was amazing (except for the rain, arghh). I did however manage to catch up with old friends, Cynthia and Tom and made new friends (Melissa/Maritza became my night posse in the Castro nightlife district). By Christmas, I was homesick and couldn’t get a ticket to Miami but noticed NYC was less than $100 one way. Made some calls and my new home became Bleecker and Leroy (Greenwich Village, NYC). I spent my New Years Eve at an apartment overlooking time square with old and new friends.

January 2009
I finished up all my apps in time and am indebted to my ex-bosses that wrote the recommendations. For the next few weeks I went from apt to apt, visiting and catching up with old friends. Kelley P. you are an amazing woman, Claire, I look forward to watching become an influential woman, Rebecca you just rock my world, Alanys I pray for you and hope you get rid of your old ways and understand that growing takes pain and most importantly push pride aside. Roman, I treasure the youth inside of you, Gerry I love everything about you, and Hector, you are such a beautiful person inside and pray you never sell yourself short as you deserve nothing but the best!
As the month came to an end, I began preparing for my move to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. I had been working with a nonprofit based there for the past few years. They were about to host the first global symposium on Engaging Men and Boys in Gender Equality and needed all the “free” help they can get. I have family there and Carnival was towards the end of February, it was really a win/win situation. HOLLERR!

February 2009
I will never forget my first day on the job, while I knew some Portuguese nothing could prepare me for the 3 hour team meeting (all in Portuguese) but I managed to get 50% of the info. I learned a lot about the NGO (nongovernmental organization) world on a global scale. And I got to live in Rio de Janeiro! I met amazing friends (most full bright scholars) and even though I sweated like no one’s business, I still love summers in Brazil!

Carnival was no exception, it was day after day of getting home at 7-9am and waking up early to continue to party. By party, I mean drinking and dancing A LOT! I’ve always heard about Carnival from websites and peeps but I never believed or could imagine the real thing. My longtime BFF came for a visit (Talena I <3 you!) and I got to show her a lil bit of why I love RIO DE JANEIRO so much!

March 2009
The global conference started the end of March and I brought reinforcements. Claire from Melvin’s Guide, came to help out and stayed with my family. I also had a blast showing Claire why Eu ADORO RIO DE JANIERO! A toda las persoas que eu conoci durante mis ferias, fue um bom plazer em conocer todos. Fuerto abrazos gentes! Maneiro!

April 2009
The global symposium was a success and not only did I learn a lot about global social issues, but I made contracts from all over the world. I mean I was even asked if I ever go to Ethopia, I could help out! But my time in Brazil was coming to an end, my $$$ was flying away because the exchange rate is not all that great. So I headed back to Miami. I called a few contacts from the symposium and my choices were narrowed down to Mexico City or Honduras. I really wanted to go to Honduras, my mom’s country, but was strongly advised to NOT ENTER by my family. They couldn’t tell me why, they just said NO! I didn’t question them and headed to Mexico City. I was a little nervous because of everything I had read and heard, but decided to take that leap.

I arrived at Juarez airport and was greeted by the NGO I came to assist. They were working on the national campaign against homophobia. I got a quick tour of Zocalo (downtown Mexico City) and checked into my hostel (which I love!). The next day, I went to the first of 4 Craigslist apt ads and fell in love with the location and family I would be staying with. I never made it to the 2-4 listings.

I had an amazing 3 days and then my life as I once knew it would change forever. Swineflu epidemic broke out in Mexico City and suddenly everyone was wearing surgical masks. Military officials everywhere were handing them out, medical professionals were constantly shoving anti-bacterial liquid at every subway stop and I began to worry. I wasn’t ready to leave just yet because I strongly believe in the cause that I came to assist and was just looking for facts. I logged onto CNN.com and began reading. I saw a note that said, are you there? Wanna report? And that’s how I became a CNN iReporter. The following week, Mexico City felt an earthquake and I was the first to break the news on CNN and became a star-reporter.

Getting on skype and video conference with the folks at CNN became a habit and I must admit, I LOVE IT! And even though I never really saw myself on TV, I especially loved getting phone calls from family in Honduras saying, ummm we saw you on TV., WTF? LOL Or a text message from my brother who works at MIA airport, saying “So I was on break, drinking coffee and as I lifted up to get the next sip you are all over the TV’s and I told my co-workers, hey that’s my brother!” Or a random Facebook posting saying, “So was watching CNN at my hotel room and I saw a report from …Francisquini and I said, hey I know a Francisquini, wait a sec that’s you!”

Seriously guys, thanks again for sending your warm thoughts. It helped me keep sane while I was in the center of it all.

May 2009
The government finally started lifting the mandatory close business sanctions and I began to have a normal (non reporter) life. I managed to make it to Oaxaca for their campaign against Homophobia and met amazing people, some of which are now my new friends. As for Mexico City, I met an amazing person that I spent my last 4 weeks with. I happy to call him my good friend in D.F. Eric sabes que te queiro muchisimo! During my stay in Mexico, I interviewed and got an ESL job teaching for a private school in KOREA!

June 2009
I made it to Miami for the one year anniversary of my father’s death, but had to quickly move to NYC to get all my paperwork for my Alien Resident Card in Korea. I had many going away parties this month and it just made me miss my good friends in NYC/Miami/Mexico City.

July – September 2009
July 6, 2009 was the day I was suppose to celebrate my birthday with friends/family but instead was spent in the air and at Tokyo’s airport. LOL. I didn’t mind so much because I was excited for my next chapter. As luck would have it, I work at my city’s biggest private ESL school and making friends was not hard (like other foreign teachers have stated). Most of the foreign teachers are straight out of college and still act like they are in college, so those are the wave hello/goodbye peeps. I have started a gay group on facebook for this city and hopefully we can make new friendships from there. But it’s hard to find someone to connect with here, on a friendship level, because I’ve accomplished (and have been through so much) and in NYC meeting successful/cool/mature peeps was quite easy. Not so much here, but I have met a number of cool folks in Korea. (if I have your cell# then you are it folks!)

My time here has mostly been spent traveling to Busan (1hr by train) or Seoul (2hrs) and while I haven’t been in Daegu much, I have had some good times. Not like NYC/Miami/Rio/Mexico but in its own way. I also began taking 2 courses to learn Korean and can now read and write a lil, speaking is still a challenge but I’m practicing 110%.

October 2009
It was time for my first job evaluation and I passed with flying colors! How could I get nothing but great scores? I love these kids. I teach 9-13yr olds and could go w/o teaching the 13yr olds, they are just bitter. But the 9-12 are just adorable and come up with the funniest things during class. Oh and did I tell you my day starts at 4:10pm and ends at 10:20pm (9:50 on Wednesdays!). Which leaves a lot of time to spare and if you know me, you know that I don’t like to stay still. But I must admit, in the US I traveled a lot by airplane (reaching platinum levels on various groups) and now I can say that I haven’t been on a plane for a lil under 4 months and I LIKE IT! I have had my fair share of traveling but it’s all been on Korea’s high speed train.

I have been in Korea for over three months and feel that there is so much this country can do with respect to tourism (specific to non Asian tourists). So I’ve decided to re-launch Melvin’s Guide and while I am keeping the “headquarters” in NYC, I plan on bridging the gap between Korea and NYC. I’ve noticed some similarities between the two cities and hope to write on that further. The two major events for the remainder of the year, in Korea, are in film and fashion. First was the 14th Annual Pusan Int’l Film Festival, dubbed as Asia’s biggest/#1 film festival. Second, the mayor of Seoul has stated that Seoul Fashion Week is top a priority in his agenda. He wants to make Korea a major fashion capitol.

Melvin’s Guide managed to get press passes to both and will be featuring both in the re-launch issue on January 2010. Pusan Film Festival was an amazing experience (read more in the issue) and Seoul Fashion Week was nonstop where I got to hang with a very cool Australian photographer (he basically took me under his wings) and a very well connected Seoul foreigner who was recently hired by CNNGo to cover Korea. I’m also talking with CNNGo and looking into working on future projects. Oh yeah, and CNN used 10 reports I made on both the film festival and fashion week. I’m now an international reporter for CNN, how cool is that?!@$

CNNGo has a few asian cities but are looking to expand soon, check it out if you plan to travel within Asia http://www.cnngo.com/

Ending Remarks
I’m 32 and now living in Korea. I still look back and think “WTF? How/what/where/when/who”. 2 years ago I had my father and last year I didn’t. A year ago, I worked for a Fortune 500 firm and made $$$, had a great life, amazing/inspiring friends and now I’m all alone on the other side of the planet “re-starting” my life. A year ago, I would always tune into CNN and see what was going on in the world and now I don’t have a TV and I’m the one in CNN, while others around the world get the news. A year ago, I was certain I would be in business school this time around and today I sit with 9 rejection letters and have become a teacher.

One would think I should have gone postal by now, but my faith in God has kept me grounded. I don’t question why he took my job, father, income, lifestyle away from me. I am here to serve him and while I’m still unsure of what my purpose in this lifetime is, I have a feeling I am getting closer to it as the days/months/years go by. Yes it does suck to not have family member alive but death is as natural as birth. And yes, I would love to find the man who will stand by me for years to come, become a great father and partner. I know God will bring him to me, once I am ready. And I will leave you with what I mentioned in one of my earlier postings. “Listen to what the world is telling you to do, and take the leap.”

Thanks for reading.

US Primetime TV - Rankings by Melvin

Thanks to my dear friends in Korea, I have found ways to download TV shows from US. Only delayed by less than 24hrs (due mostly to time change). So here's my top list for Fall 2009 TV Shows:
#1 Daily Show
#2 Big Bang Theory
#3 Grey's
#4 CSI Miami/NYC
#5 New adventures of old christine
#6 How I met your mother
#7 Private Practice
#8 Colbert Report
#9 90210
#10 The Good Wife
#11 Top Chef/ANTM
#12 Brother's & Sister's

Worth mentioning:
Ugly Betty (Soon)
Entourage (season just ended)
True Blood (season just ended)

Pool Party - Seoul Korea!

quick update to my bloggers, life in Korea is GREATTTT!

Listen to what the world is telling you to do, and take the leap.

I was watching the season finale of "How I met your mother" and there was a part that just spoke to me. It was the part where Lily was asking Ted, "why he had to be an architect?". Ted's response was, "because I have to be an architect". And Lily response to Ted was, "Listen to what the world is telling you to do, and take the leap."

I think during these tough times around the world, 1,000,000's of people are getting laid off and searching for replacement jobs. People are looking to do the same exact job, when in fact the world is telling them to CHANGE.

For the past 8 months I have been doing just that, well the first 2 months I was doing what I wanted without listenting to the world. But once I just accepted that I'm not the one that paves the road, merely a driver. Life has been one AMAZING journey and I look forward to listening to what the world has to say and expects from my actions.

Cheers from Korea!

Officially an Alien Resident of South Korea (SoKo)

I spent most of my birthday, July 6, 2009 traveling around the world with the final destination being Daegu, South Korea. I started in Miami, then Detroit, then Tokyo and last airport stop was Pusan, South Korea (South side of the country). An employee of the company I was going to work for picked me up and drove me 1 hour away to my temporary housing in Daegu. I began training the following day and for the first 4 days, I got an average of 3-4hrs of sleep. Thankfully, work doesn’t start until 4pm and ends at 11pm but my body just couldn’t adjust.

My first weekend in SoKo, should have been spent relaxing but you all know me better, I decided to join a group of 45 folks from my school to Korea’s biggest mud festival. It generally attracts over 1 million visitors and I was eager to begin making new friends. All photos are on facebook and as you can see I not only had a great time but made some cool a$$ f’ing friends.

My first week teaching was awesome. I was still struggling with the culture change, my body was still not use to the hours but one thing was not giving me any stress and that was the work I was getting paid to do. Teaching is extremely easy and lesson plans are laid out for me every week. I just have to execute them and that folks is what I call a 180 degree change from what I use to do. Not that I hate consulting or that I see myself teaching forever, but after 9 years of consulting, I am going to enjoying not stressing about my job. Especially enjoying the fact that work only begins until 4pm and completely ends at 10:20pm! No taking work home, blackberry, etc. J

My second week was uneventful until I unexpectedly received my ALIEN RESIDENT CARD. I thought it would take longer, but as soon as I got it, we went str8 to the bank and opened my account. And now I’m writing on my 3-week anniversary and today I got my cell phone! Yahoo! Little by little, I am settling into this very comfy situation and am looking forward to I begin traveling throughout Korea and the rest of Asia!

My apartment is in a great quiet street and considerably large and I have a washing machine inside! God I miss this, never had it in NYC.

As far as a special someone is concerned, that is just not going to happen here. Apparently, the gay life just exists in Seoul (2hrs from here) and while theres one or 2 spots in Daegu, most gay anything is repressed here. I am not sad (not happy) about this because I think a year of self reflection will do me some good. But I am also not dismissing any opportunities that present themselves. Stay tuned…

As far as nightlife is concerned, I am very happy to report that I have had many nights that ended at 4am and 10am on weekends. There is just always something to do in this town and the expat community is large and connected. Unfortunately all straight, but heck it can’t all be perfect ey? As long as good music is around, I will remain a happy camper!

That’s all for now folks. Just wanted to report in and say that I finally got to Korea and have made some progress in settling down (at least for the next year (or 2, who knows).

1 week from Mexico City to Miami and finally NYC

I can honestly say that I did not expect the events that occur in the past week, but one thing I can expect from God is CHANGE IS INEVITABLE. Go with change and you just might enjoy life to the fullest. And to say the least I learned that I have changed, who knew living outside the US for past 5 months would change me and without knowing it did. Here’s the breakdown of what happened:

Sat, June 6

The dreaded day Erik and I knew would come. L Erik stayed the night and took me to the airport. My flight was of course delayed because of weather conditions in Miami. Erik had to leave at 4pm but stayed til my flight left and was just such a sweetheart. I actually got part of my crying out of the way on the car ride to the airport (managed to hide it from Erik). We were at the airport lounge enjoying each other’s company until we faced the inevitable and went for our last kiss (god my heart still hearts just thinking of it). I continued cry-fest-palooza in the plane while I watched all the photos we took, while listening to a mix’d CD he burnt for me.

I got to Miami and had VIP red carpet treatment by longtime friend Johan. He picked me up in swanky Lexus SUV and had pre-party drink on-hand and headed to South Beach, Miami, FL. We went to Halo and began drinking non-menu items, it seems my dear friend is a bit of an exclusive member of this public venue. I hadn’t drank much alcohol for the past 3 weeks (Erik doesn’t drink) and it just took 2 drinks at Halo to know that nite was going to be ONE HOT MESS! And it was because apparently we went bar hoping and I don’t remember anything until the following morning. I <3 South Beach!

Sun, June 7

June 7, 2009 marks the one year anniversary of my uncle’s (the only father figure I had) death. It was a day spent with family, we remembered the good times and cried/cried/cried. I am totally fine with death, I know it’s inevitable. I just cry because I wish I could share all the successes and setbacks with loved ones. That’s all I have to say on this subject.

Mon-Wed, June 8-10

Welcome back festivities shared with friends. All located on my facebook, duh! LOL. But special shout-outs to Roxane, Monica, Jimmy, Tina, Eli and Marco (my bros to the death).

Thur, June 11

Flying to NYC! I was finally settled into my swank Greenwich Village (Leroy/Bleecker) accommodations, when I got a call from Jacky (cousin of mine that works in internal PR for highfashion brand) and said there’s an “IT” party 4 blocks from where I was. Greenhouse is one of those places you just have to go and see, no other words can explain it. I went because I wanted to catch up with my girls and when I got it, I was quickly reminded of the swank lifestyle I once had.

I have been living in 3rd world (aka developing) countries and while Brazil/Mexico tries to have a swank/posh scene, you just can’t compare to NYC. My introduction into could not have been more memorable. It was the who’s who of the fashion/entertainment industry. Tyson B made a brief appearance, like with many celebs my friend have to point them out (I’m just not good at it, sucks because I always seem to place myself amongst celebs and could never tell them apart from joe-smo). There was a jet player that was beautiful and I am still convinced he plays for my team (no confirmation, as of yet-teehee). The rest of what happened that nite is on FB, vids included.

I was tired but Jacky said there’s an after party at the owner of SoBe drink’s swank penthouse. Suddenly, I found my second wind. LOL. Vids on FB.

Friday, June 12

The much anticipated, Welcome back to Verlaine, party was here! I wasn’t expecting more than 5-7 friends and ended up taking over half the bar. I <3 every single person that came, thanks y’all. Since I’m not sure where I’ll b in life, I’ll just leave the details to those that were there. But I will say this, HOT F’ING MESS!! Roman came by and took me to No Parking, another great nite of dancing!

Sat-Sun, June 13-14

Most of Saturday was spent recovering, but that was fine because NYC’s weather sucked! L
But I had a full nite of events, starting with Matt’s bday in NYU area. Then off to see Jamie (who was in town for one nite) in East Village. 3rd on the list, went to see Juan/Step for Kaymi’s bday in Lower East Side. Then Roman picked me up and we headed to my #1 spot in Queens – Atlantis. Unlike previous nites, little drinking was involved as I just wanted to dance! The club was not as packed as usual, but I want to believe it was because of PR parade festivities in manhattan. Worked out for me cuz it gave me more dancing space- LOL. There was a minor of a setback throughout the nite but this person does not deserve the time/effort it takes to write about him. I will say this much, with so much I wanted to say I pretty much sum’d it up with 2 words, Grow up. (for my blog followers, I finally got closure and feel a huge weight off)

Sunday was spent hanging with Claire in the apartment, then went uptown for pre-party drinks at David’s swank harlem apartment. The four of us headed to Madison sq park for NYC’s biggest BBQ event, then hung out with “Ms. PR” at subways and headed back uptown for more drinking. I ended the nite with Angelo/Roman at Hiro. Without a doubt Hiro delivered another great NYC house music dancing event and for FREE! Again, pics/vids on FB.

Summary

And there you go folks, in just 7 days I got to:
1. say goodbye to someone very special to my heart in Mexico City,
2. reunited with long-time friends/family in Miami,
3. reflected on the past year after my uncle’s death,
4. got red carpet treatment entrance to both Miami and NYC,
5. reunited with friends in NYC,
6. reunited with my favorite spots in NYC (Verlaine, No Parking, Atlantis and Hiro) and
7. finally got closure with the Cuban (and while it was unexpected, I knew God would assure our paths would cross – I just have that kind of relationship with the big G)

Friends “with benefits”, playing with fire or does it work?

About 4 weeks ago, I went clubbing with friend and he took me to Lipstick (one of Mexico City’s “it” gay nightclubs). We instantly clicked as friends and were enjoying the rooftop bar, after about an hour/or so I told him I wanted to go down and dance. Long and behold, I see his guy with a unique way of dancing and when he smiled at me, I no one else mattered and I could not keep my eyes off of him. After minutes of flirting, we finally introduced ourselves (let’s call him “Erik”) and we were inseparable.

I knew he was new to the scene when about 10 minutes into our conversation, he said “What are you looking for?” and I responded “well it would be nice to have a long term relationship but that comes with time”. He continued to say he just got out of a relationship and isn’t looking for something serious, I replied with a smile “how about we just be friends (with benefits)”.

Friends with benefits was my plan and I told myself that it would be a great thing to have in Mexico. I could have a friendship and not tie any feelings, but even as I said it at the beginning I knew that there was a possibility of it backfiring. So for the next week, we chatted and texted (because I was out of town) and the moment I got back in town (week 2) we met for coffee. This lead to a series of very romantic dates, which grew into meeting his closest friends.

3 weeks later, we see each other 5-7 times a week and every time I see him I get the biggest smile and joy inside my heart. We finally admitted our feelings last night and decided to avoid the long distance drama and just be friends. Only God knows what the future holds. The only thing I do know is that my last 3 weeks in Mexico City were amazing and I got to spend it with an amazing/beautiful person who offered nothing but his kind soul.

I will miss the nights where I feel asleep under his arms, the passionate kisses and most of all the warm feeling I get inside when I see him. My last relationship was about a year ago and while I do know meeting Mr. Right takes time, I can’t complain about meeting this guy in Mexico. Better to have “loved” than to never have “loved”, right? I know we will have a friendship and I look forward to the next time I meet a guy that gave me what Erik did.

My answer to the topic is playing with fire, but I’d love to hear what you guys/gals think.

1 week left in Mexico City

I can’t believe how time has flown. So much has happened in the short time I was in Mexico, approx 5 weeks that I don’t know where to begin. I got to Mexico City and in just 2 days I was a part of history. While the swine flu did bring fear/uncertainty into my life, it also brought fame. Who would have thought that I would be broadcast all over the world, on one of the most reputable channels (CNN). Another few days pass by and I experience my first earthquake! I seriously thought about returning back home where it was “safe”, but I strongly believe on the cause I came to work on (fight against homophobia) and decided to stay.

For the next 2 weeks I began reporting for CNN and learned a lot about what get’s placed on TV, internet and what doesn’t make the cut. Once the city lifted its sanctions, the city came alive like no other and I finally got to enjoy the nightlife I heard so much about. On my first Saturday, I went out with a new friend I met online (nonsexual for those freaky friends I have reading this-LOL). It was here that I met this guy who danced with such passion and when our eyes met, his smile made my heart stop. We ended up hanging out the rest of the night and he immediately said he can’t commit because he just got out of a relationship. I, of course, am quite use to these type of response and just said cool we can be friends (broken record- I KNOW!). His name is Erik.

A few days later I headed out to Oaxaca, Mexico where the campaign against homophobia was underway. But on my bus ride there, I got a call from Erik and he wanted to see if we could get coffee. My heart just melted because he asked me as if it was a date and I told him I would call him when I get back to D.F. During the 5 days I was at Oaxaca, I literally had a nonstop party/work schedule. Wake up early in the morning to help out with the campaign and at about 11pm we shifted to bars/clubs/drinking fest. I was in heaven but I knew I was dragging my body into exhaustion. I made a lot of friends while I was in Oaxaca and I was very sad to go. People here had no attitude, unlike the folks in D.F.

Once I got back to D.F. I immediately sent a text to Eric and we decided to head out for coffee that Thursday. We ended up grabbing coffee and walking alongside Paseo de Reforma, during one of Mexico City’s most beautiful nights, clear skies/light breeze and we kissed for most of the night. He drove me back home and I was left in cloud 9. For the past 2 weeks, we’ve spent as much time together and we told ourselves we would not mix feelings because we both knew this would end June 6. A few days ago, we both agreed that while we did not want it, feelings are now involved. I keep avoiding June 6 and just keep living and loving every minute I have with him. He makes me smile and brings joy into my heart.

With regards to everything else, I already told the nonprofit that my last day is next Monday and I am feeling sad (again!). I met a lot of cool people here and it kind of sucks that it has to end but I am getting use to it (first with Mercer folks, then Promundo and now Demysex). It’s not my favorite part of the last few months but it's become a part of life.

I’m taking the next week off from volunteering and exploring the part of Mexico City that was shut down thanks to swine flu. And I will use my downtime to mentally prepare myself for my next journey (details will soon come out! I'm not officially announcing it until I obtain my work-visa).

The past few months that I have been living outside of the good ole USofA has brought me closer to the friends I have there. It has shown me who the true friends are and who the “need u for…” are. It has also brought closure to some and brought me closer to others.

May 2008, I was living a life of comfort and fortune and now May 2009, I am living the life I was destined to live.

Closure

Earlier this week I wrote about “What to do with unanswered emails/calls” and asked my peeps for their input. I got quite a number of “forget his a$$”, as well as some great advice but the one that topped it all was “Sometimes you just don’t get closure from the other person”. This was the best advice I’ve received this year and definitely on my top list. All of my relationships have had closure; some were good while others not so good, some I initiated and others I was the recipient.

This “thing” (just can’t call it a relationship because it wasn’t) was very persistent in keeping me in his life. Even went so far as to say, I want your friendship in my life and of course I was idiot and believed him. I hid my feelings just so that I can hang around him. Whenever he needed me, I would make time out of my busy schedule to console him and give him advice. I tricked myself to believe this was just a friendship, when in fact my heart was on a very different page.

And now it’s been one year, I’ve been out of the country for months now and have thought about which friendships matter to me. He was on top of my list. After countless emails and a voicemail, I have now come to realize that he has moved on. What I did to deserve this, I am still unclear. But whatever it was, no one deserves the silent treatment. And so I’m FINALLY taking the advice some friends have voiced from the beginning (yes KG, u were one of them) and cutting him out of my life.

Closure would have been ideal because it would mean friendship is a possibility (after x months of course) in the future. But as I went through my aim/gmail settings and created filters where I would never see a letter from him, I have come to terms that this “thing” has no future. My biggest fear was that I would run into him in some random street in NYC (because Karma works that way for me), but now that I’m preparing to leave the US (to a country far-far away) on a 1yr contract, my fears have begun to diminish. Yes I’m still going to NYC for a quick visit in June and yes I’ll be staying in the same area (the Bronx) and yes we’ll probably end up at the same bar, but my fears are gone.

This topic has its irony because this guy I’m dating in Mexico is also going through a breakup and I’m here giving him advice to cut him out. I tell him, friendship will come but you need time apart from him. If only I could follow my own advice.

Mexico City Earthquake - May 22

Just filmed this for CNN and well let's just say I've gotten emails from Seattle to Miami that they saw me on CNN. This just doesn't get old!

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-261768

What do you do with unanswered emails/calls

So I'm struggling with a "friend" of mine that lives in NYC and wanted to see if anyone had some insights.

Background: We dated briefly; he didn’t want to commit and just wanted a friendship. We had a great year of intense flirting, both having other relationships on the side but whenever we got together regardless of our dating status we would both be on cloud 9. At one point I thought he was my soul mate but alas that thought is slowly fading. I say slowly because I don’t want to let the feeling go but the fact that he continues to ignore my calls/emails is pushing me further away. In March, I wrote him an email asking if he had time to get coffee (during my 3 day NYC trip) and I never heard back from him.

Current situation: So every 1-2 months, I go on for days thinking about him. I don't know if that's him calling out for me or if I get bored and need something to obsess about. This happened 2 weeks ago, when I also purchased a 1-way ticket to NYC in hopes of finding a permanent job there. I naturally asked him if I could crash at his place for a bit (yes I know, not the smartest of my ideas) but also said if he can’t, I still wanted to grab coffee. Once again, I didn’t get a response and I would call him but I lost his number during one of my many many cell phone replacements. (Side note: please don’t ever let me borrow any electronic devices; we just don’t get along-LOL)

So now it’s been 2 weeks since I last emailed him, I even asked for his number and he has yet to reply. I have gone over many scenarios from:
1. He’s just not the type of friend that responds
2. He’ll just wait till I get to NYC to talk

But in the end a good friend of mine wrapped it up beautifully: He’s not worth it if he doesn’t pay you the same amount of attention! This not only goes for friendships but also for your potential lifetime partner. Please re-read that statement, it is just so simple and often overlooked but those words are powerful and can help you ease your mind/soul. Your time/thoughts/values are unique and should never be “changed” for ANYONE.

If that person can’t value you as much as you value yourself (here’s where folks with low self esteem get caught), then that person is just not worth your time. It’s hard to move on, trust me we are all victims of this, but we’ve got to believe someone out there exists that will give you the attention/love/time you deserve.

I would love to hear from my friends, let me know what you think.

My feelings for this boy: Yes I do know that I have unresolved feelings for this boy, but I was cool with just a friendship. I continued to email/call him because throughout the time we've known each other he repeatedly said, he wants me in his life (friendship). And I said of course, but it is clear to me that it's under his terms and just that. And that he is just a selfish MoFo and while some of his friends are cool with that, this HONDURICAN is not! I have high expectations of my friends and in return I give it my all. In life, u get 3 types of friends.#1. come and goes #2. stay for an occasion or 2 and #3. lifetime. As most know, #3 group is a very small group.
Alanys I truly wanted u to be in the third group but I guess you were always meant for #2.

Faith/Karma: As I wrote my "last" email to Alanys, letting him know that he got his wish and it would be my last email/call to him. (Let's keep in mind that I have no clue what I did to deserve no responses but I figured he's going through some personal stuff. ) I was aim'ing with Claire who knows faith/karma will try to intervene. See folks, this isn't the first I tried to get "rid" of Alanys but for some reason or another, he always finds his way back into my life/heart. The last time I tried to cut him out, we literally bumped into each other on a random side street in NYC (a city of millions and our paths had to cross) and Claire was there to witness (and she too was dumbfounded). But as I told Claire, enough is enough. FCUK faith/karma I am intervening here and cutting him out. I don't care anymore whether he is suppose to be in my life or not but I can't take the hurt anymore.

Oaxaca's first gay ceremony

It was an honor to have been invited to this very intimate and historical event. Check out my CNN report for videos/pics at:

English: http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-260149

Espanol: http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-260342

First 2 weeks in Mexico City

5 minutes of fame
Folks, if there were ever a poster for “Things happen for a reason”, I’ve gotta say that my face/life would be on that poster. I mean, 12 months ago, I was working at a major consulting firm and now my videos are on CNN and CNN en Espanol and every time I google’d my name, I find another country that quoted me! Seriously this is still surreal. I have received countless emails from family/friends/contacts saying, “So I was reading an article and saw your name! or I was watching TV and I saw you!”. While I know this is just my 5 minutes of fame, I am thoroughly enjoying it and this experience has served as a testament to the way I believe one should live their life “Just go with the flow, good/bad”. Some might not know this but my original travel ticket was to Honduras, but a last minute plea from my aunt made it change to Mexico City.

CNN Interview:http://edition.cnn.com/video/#/video/ireports/2009/04/28/dcl.irpt.mexico.city.flu.cnn

CNN TV segment: http://edition.cnn.com/video/?/video/ireports/2009/05/04/irpt.for.cnn.may2.pt.1.cnn

CNN Quote#1: http://edition.cnn.com/2009/TRAVEL/05/07/danger.travel/index.html

CNN Quote #2: http://edition.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/04/30/swine.flu/

CNN Quote #3: http://cnn.mlogic.mobi/cnn/archive/archive/detail/294174/2;jsessionid=AE780CDE854DF08C94DF20E9B63F9351.live23ib

New York Cares writes about me: http://edition.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/04/30/swine.flu/

Quoted in Spain: http://www.elcorreogallego.es/gente-y-comunicacion/ecg/primer-contagiado-fuera-espanol/idEdicion-2009-04-30/idNoticia-421875/

I have no clue what language this is: http://wiadomosci.onet.pl/1962361,441,item.html

Living Situation
I am currently renting out a room (w/ private bathroom) in an amazing part of México City, next to police station so I totally feel safe. Supermarket, 7-eleven (huge here), laundry, restaurants, museums are all within 1-2 blocks from my place. The metro is a 10 minute walk. I can walk to downtown and Zona Rosa (Mexico City gay district and tourist too). The room includes utilities, cleaning and a great environment! Total cost approx $180 A MONTH!!!

Great Quote
The lady that owns the apt is 71 years old and always gives me advice about life and the city. Her latest saying is one that made me laugh and is so true, “You want to make God laugh, tell him what you are planning on doing today”.

Nightlife and Dating Life
Even though México City’s nightlife recently opened, I have seen enough to say ME LIKEY LONG TIME. It’s your typical city of 22million and you’re going to run into a bar/club where the snob factor is absurd. But when I go to a bar/club, my #1 priority is music and they have great music! Ironically, much better than Rio de Janeiro. I went out this past Friday and Saturday night and I have to admit, the crowd was extremely diverse. I was expecting most to look Indian but it just wasn’t the case. I was left in total aw.

As for my dating life, it never ceases to amaze me that no matter where I am in the world. I always meet someone that is unavailable (I’ll just leave it at that). But my dating life has never been busy, again unlike when I was living in Brazil. In Brazil, I had trouble dating because I looked like a native and other native were in search for exotic (aka Caucasian). In Mexico, I signed up for a gay dating site (one that I was a member of back in 2000 but quit when I moved to NYC-just don’t need it in NYC). So as soon as I signed up, I have had nonstop inquiries.

I just went on a date last night and unfortunately he just got out of a 2yr LTR and is only looking for “friends”. Truth be told, if I find Mr. Right I have no problem with moving my life to Mexico City. I am at the point of my life where being with the man I love is my number one priority, everything else can be “allocated”. So whether he’s in Mexico City, Miami, NYC… I am ready to settle.

Volunteering

So what I am doing in Mexico, besides living life and dating. Well, I came here to work on the National Campaign against Homophobia. This campaign is important to me because I plan to use what I learn and get involved with other countries’ campaign, specifically CUBA! Yes, for those followers my love for Cuba will never end and even if I don’t end up with a Cuban man, I still have love for that country.

I am currently volunteering for the HQ of this campaign and how did I get this contact, NETWORKING NETWORKING NETWORKING!! I have stressed this on previous blogs but this will serve as another testament on how important it is to effective network. Because of my volunteering in Brazil, I got an in on this NGO in Mexico. I will describe what occurred so you can see why I feel blessed (and why I decided to not leave Mexico during the H1N1 epidemic”.

As soon as I got back from Brazil, I emailed one of the executive directors of the NGO (aka nonprofit) in Brazil. I asked him that I overheard Mexico’s campaign were looking volunteers and if he could direct me to the right person. He provided it within minutes and I sent a “cold call” email to the executive director. He wanted to know what specifically I was requesting from the NGO. I told him very simply, not looking for $ just a learning experience. He said, come on over. I booked my flight and he said someone will be at the airport to pick me up. I was certainly not expecting that but was grateful. The office assistant came with another coworker and they took me to the hostel I was staying at (while I secured permanent housing). They later took me out to dinner and walked me back to my hostel, I was like – this is so nice of both of you. I totally got the red carpet from perfect strangers (sorta).

On the first day of work, it was slow because everyone was dealing with the swine-flu “crisis” but I got to speak with the executive director candidly. I told him I come from a corporate consulting job and I came here to learn. No task was too big or small. Then he basically opened his rolodex and said, what state do you want to visit? I was like :-O He basically said that wherever I want to go he has contacts and I can volunteer there and visit at the same time. I just met this guy but because of who I knew, he rolled out the “red carpet”.

This was one of the biggest reasons why I decided to stay and not leave when the hundreds/thousands of tourists were flocking out of Mexico during H1N1 epidemic.

First homophobic experience in Mexico
Once again, I just don’t know how I get myself into these situations. So I checked into a hostel for my first 5 days in Mexico City and on the second day I decided to take a day trip with other hostels patrons. I met 2 Mexicans that were staying in the same hotel, one from US and other from nearby state. They were apparently online friends for the past year and finally got to meet each other. Both male and straight. Of course when they asked me what I was doing here, I mentioned the anti-homophobic campaign and I “automatically” came “out” but they were cool with it. After 2 days of hanging out with both of them, I had my suspicions but didn’t feel like I needed to voice them out because they both knew I was gay. And on the third day, I caught them making out. They didn’t know I saw them and they never “came out” to me. It was actually the last day I was at the hostel and we had lunch before I moved to my new apt. Instead of inviting them to hang afterwards, I said you two need alone time to “catch up” and of course they never got it. I totally understand where one of them is coming from because he’s from a smaller state and homosexuality is just not tolerated. I’m sure he’s starting or just experimenting with it and doesn’t know how to express himself to me. But the other dude from EEUU is one that I had issues with because he’s from a big city and knows better. That’s what I thought at least. Goes to show you that no matter where you are, homophobia exists and I am proud/honored to be a part of an international movement. May 17th, 2009 is International Day against Homophobia.

Next..
What’s next, well events in the capital city was pushed back a week to 5/20-5/22 so I’m headed to Oaxaca, Mexico (Mexico’s second poorest state) for their campaign against homophobia. Not sure what to expect but one this if for sure, I’ll be covering it LIVE! LOL, stay tuned…

Site for future CNN reports

Hi folks, so I'm going to stay away from posting all the reports I post on CNN. From now on, you can go to my profile page and view at your leisure.
http://www.ireport.com/people/HonduRican

Thanks again to those friends that have sent your warm thoughts/prayers. I am (to-date) good in health, a little bored but I like many mexican citizens are anxiously waiting for May 6. When life as we once knew it, WILL RESUME!!

CNN en Espanol tune in!

Folks I've been on CNN en Espanol all day yesterday (my family told me first then I saw myself last night-YAY).

They just told me I'll be on today as well! Only TV, no internet. Tune in!!!

Se comienza cerrar la Cuidad de Mexico (D.F.)

My first CNN ireport Espanol!

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-251812

Mexico City prepares to shut down

I just wrote this report last night. Things here continue to get worst (with regards to service industry), as far as wide spread of swine flu - I think we have it under control. It just sucks that we have to shut a city of 20million people to keep it under control, but I've been through many hurricanes in my life and know the drill.

Here's a link to my ireport for CNN.
http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-251737

p.s. don't forget to rate it (5 stars are apprecited, LOL.)

My first LIVE interview with CNN

Looks like the story I posted yesterday, attracted the right producer because at about 10.30 EST I got an email from CNN wanting to interview me live via Skype! Here's the coverage and of course I am still without word. Especially since 5 minutes my interview I got an email from CNN en Espanol saying they would love to "talk" with me. Stay tuned...

Interview with CNN
http://edition.cnn.com/video/?/video/ireports/2009/04/28/dcl.irpt.mexico.city.flu.cnn

I posted this story today, it's now my 2nd ireport coverage!

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-251221

Today I experienced my first earthquake in Mexico City, Mexico

As if the deadly flu wasn't enough, I was sitting in the office watching TV with everyone from the office because the Sec of Health was providing needed information on what should we do. Long and behold the table, chair, ground started shaking and I was convinced I caught the deadly flu and about to faint. Thankfully, my coworkers said no it's an earthquake and I said "oh that's how that feels?". I was shook up for hours and was on CNN.com trying 2 get more details. They had a "are you there" section and I decided to click and write my story. Less than 20 minutes passed and I got an email from CNN saying THEY'RE GOING TO POST IT ON TV!!! Here's my story folks and I think I'm going to make this a habit, at least this way I can get my few seconds of fame. LOL

http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-250711

81 deaths, 1000's cases and well I'm just...

partying with precautions!

here's CNN info on deadly flu happening here in Mexico City.

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/HEALTH/04/26/swine.flu/index.html

First 24 hrs in Mexico City, Districto Federal (D.F.), Mexico

4pm – I deplane and walk right through immigration and customs. Outside, I was greeted by employees of the NGO (non-governmental organization) that I came down here to assist. It was very kind of them and I felt at ease. Norma and Juan, were just excited to see me, as if were were family members that hadn’t seen each other in years. At first I felt weird cuz I’m thinking, um lady I just met you. But this like any other foreign experience I’ve encountered is just part of the learning process. I went to the first exchange rate window and got 11.5 pesos (mistake #1) for my 1 dollar. Then we went to the other side of the airport (very nice btw) to catch a legit cab. FYI: cab related crime is ridiculous here and if you don’t call a cab service, you’re chances of getting mugged increase 300%. During our walk, which took forever, over to the cab I noticed other exchange rate windows giving 12.9 for 1USD. That’s when I realized, you gotta shop around!

We finally got a cab (120 pesos – aka a lil less than 10USD) and headed into the downtown traffic. During the ride, long and behold we stood right next to another car with a CUBAN flag on it. I seriously do love Cubans, by now I hope you all get this, but in mexico city!!! LOL, I just laughed because I told myself. If I end up with a Cuban from Mexico, that would just be icing on the cake! First a Cuban in Miami, then NYC then Rio and now Mexico! Ay caramba! Traffic was horrible but no different than Rio de Janeiro, so I was just sat and waited.

6pm – We finally got to my hostel (mexico city hostels) and I checked into my single room which totally rocked! Also the location could not have been more central, we were right next to huge cathedral and the Zocalo area. But just like with any other big city downtown, it’s great during the day but at night you gotta watch out! Norma and Juan said they would take me out to dinner and I continued to feel greatly appreciated. They took me to famous restaurant, gorgeous views called Sambroso (I think). I had soup and beef tacos, along with some mix of natural juices and when the check came, they paid (yay!!). I had my first stalker at dinner, guy sitting 3 tables away with his “friend” and could not stop looking at me. I just smiled and flirted (just a lil, I mean it would be mean if I didn’t. it’s what I do best, giving back to the community – teehee).

8pm – Instead of the traditional American thing to do, point the visitor in the right direction and say bye. Norma/Juan walked out of their way and took me back to hostel. Gotta say it was a lil annoying at first but I appreciated what they did and also took that as a sign that this neighborhood is not that safe. So I stayed in and caught up with my emails/facebook/etc.

10 pm – went nite nite

8am – I woke up and eat the hostel free b’fast (yuk but it’s free so can’t complain). I went online to research the location of the CL apt ad I had been communicating with since the past week. I noticed that it was really close to the gayborhood and near all the gay bars/clubs I would go. I was seriously hoping it would turn out fine and I could sign the lease. I got on the metro and headed to Col. Juarez.

9am – As I ran to the metro, the office took her hands and held mine pushing it away from the subway car. She screams “Mujeres solamente” and I said inside, NOT FCUKING AGAIN! The same exact thing happened in Rio! Apprently they have women only cars during rush hour and I had to wait for the next one, ughh! I got off the station and was completely lost but I love it. Eventually I got there, had to ask 2 times for the directions – teehee (to my defense, I had no map just an address), but I noticed the area was nice/secure (unlike zocalo).

10am – I was roaming around in Col. Juarez, finally found the apt and start chatting w/ lady, Silvia. Silvia looks like she is in her mid 70s, her niece and grandchild were there. He was just adorable! I held him and took care of him while she made me coffee. We discuss the important stuff first, who r u, what r u doing here, then just chatted and hung around. She mentioned that her daughter was going to show up on TV soon, and then pointed at someone. I didn’t think twice cuz I figured it was a figure of speech. After about 40-50 minutes, I was sold and went to nearby ATM and took out $2,500 pesos for the month (avg 190USD). I got my keys and as I was about to leave and the lady on TV was walking in! We greeted each other and she said, sit down and let’s have a chat. I was like :-O – OK! She’s part of some morning talk show in DF (I’m not sure if it’s local or national, but eventually I’ll find out and post on blog).

Noon – It was finally time to head home and I said my goodbyes. 2 trains later I was back in Zocalo, I was a happy bee because I loved the apt and especially the location. Now I can finally focus on the tourist stuff! At the hostel, I signed up for the Pyramid day tour and the part I’m most excited about is the night tour to LUCHA LIBRE! Oh I just can’t wait, seriously! Since I booked my Friday, I wanted to know how to get to work (DEMYSEX) and decided to head over now.

2pm – In no time, I was at demysex and Norma continued to give me the VIP treatment.

3pm – I was reading information on demysex and did some gmail/fb/linkedin catching up.

4pm – It was finally time to head home and I got some McDonald’s on my way home, oh yeah, I went there.. I’m loving it! LOL

Last day in Miami, Florida - USA

My last 24hrs was full of emotions. I was anxious and scared of my move to D.F. For the first time in my life I was going to a foreign country without knowing anyone or traveling with someone that’s familiar. I felt like the 1.5 week I was in Miami just wasn’t enough. My grandmother (98yr old) was in the hospital for most of my stay and she was just hilarious the day I was leaving. I shed a tear when I said goodbye because I knew this could be the last time. I mean she’s def strong, but one just never knows. My mom, aunts and gm had apparently saved up all their energy for the last 24 hours because it was nonstop advice on what I should and should not be doing in DF. I am def way too old for what they were saying, but the lil kid in me appreciated the attention and love I was receiving so I just sat back and took it all in with a smile. I also visited old friends and family members I hadn’t see in well over a year. Those are always good times.

Let’s not forget that the beginning of my Miami stay, started out with a weekend family trip to Orlando, Walt Disney World. Followed by Miami/SouthBeach’s gayPride weekend festivities where I got to also hang out with friends I hadn’t seen in years!

The short 1.5 week I stayed in Miami was an intense stay, which ended with a much needed 30 minute nonstop sobbing session. It had been months since my last “session” but I believe that crying is healthy and was so excited it was finally happening.

I’ve had some memorable times in Miami (per blog) and this was once again, one of the most memorable times in Miami.

Another not so typical 24hrs in Melvin’s life (Rio de Janeiro --> Miami --> Orlando)

It seems like it was just yesterday that I was packing for my 2 month “internship” at a nonprofit in Brazil. I met some amazing individuals at the nonprofit and made some new friends. I shed tears as I said goodbye to the beautiful people I met and those that have been long time friends. I can honestly say I could see myself living in Rio de Janeiro but alas the time to leave was here. I now flip the last page of this chapter and a new one begins. I learned so much about how a nonprofit can function internationally and made invaluable connections during last week’s global symposium (aka conference).

4p.m. – Tuesday (April 7, 2009)
It is 4pm and our cab was outside waiting to pick us up en route to Rio’s international airport. It took me about 2 hours of packing but I finally had all my possessions in 3 big size luggages. We had one of the most smoothes ride to the airport and made it in record time, less than 40 minutes. Walked right into through security/custom and got to the gate 3 hours early!!! LOL, we did a quick run through duty free and while passing a different gate I ran into an old friend, Trisha, from NYC (full-brighter in Rio) as she was waiting for her flight too. She’s been in Rio for over a year and was key in introducing me to my Rio “posse”.
We sat for over an hour catching up because for the past 3 weeks we just couldn’t find time to meet. Ain’t it funny how you can live so close and not have time to hang, kinda like NYC, huh?

8p.m. – Tuesday (April 7, 2009)
After chatting with Trisha, we sat down at the airport bar and started drinking Skol beer cans (R$3.5o) until we ran out off local currency. LOL. Funny part was that we still had $R12 left that just goes to show you how cheap things are in Brasil. Needless to say we got to our gate pretty buzzed and I fell asleep as soon as we sat down.

3a.m. – Wednesday (April 8, 2009)
The b’fast cart slammed into me waking me up and I screamed Apple Juice! LOL. Apparently the flight caught the right wind and got to MIA 30 minutes earlier. We landed at approx 3.30a.m. and sat on the tarmac because US Customs in Miami does not open until 4am – ugghh. Despite my mood, I cruised right through customs and found myself saying goodbye to Claire too soon. She went through the reboarding doors and I through the exit. And as soon as I opened those doors I cursed in 3 languages because the weather was in the 50’s. Apparently, some kind of cold front was going through Florida. After 20 minutes of waiting my cousin outside, I was finally in the car en route to my aunt’s house (Melvin’s temporary digs).

6a.m. – Wednesday (April 8, 2009)
I was graciously provided 1 hour to unpack and repack my dirty cloth (to be washed at the hotel). I slammed the back door after packing the SUV with our luggage and we were en route to Orlando, Florida. Luckily it was only 3 of us, there was one car driving from Jacksonville and another from Homestead, Florida. In total, there was 12.5 family members about to embark on a 3-day all park access to Walt Disney World. I can’t remember the last time I was in Disney. It was either on GayDisney (The one day out of the year that Disney makes special accommodations to the homosexual community) or 5 yrs ago at my lil cousin’s 5th birthday. We were here this weekend to celebrate her 10th b-day.

10a.m. – Wednesday (April 8, 2009)
We finally arrive to the hotel and join the other 9 family members. We checked into our hotel, but our rooms weren’t ready (shocker!) and got our 3day park passes. We jumped on the hotel bus and headed to Epcot! Oh yeah, we stayed at a Disney hotel – All Star Hotels (Music).

3p.m. – Wednesday (April 8, 2009)
After eating at a Chinese restaurant on epcot’s famous circle of countries, we headed back home for a quick nap, b4 the evening festivities began.This ends yet another untypical 24hr in Melvin’s life.

Next blog will about the nonprofit in Brasil and my work in the global conference.

Here monkey monkey (Sugarloaf Mountain, RJ, Brasil)

Melvin’s 4 day USA tour (NYC à Miami à Rio de Janeiro, Brasil)

Day 1 – Sunday
At around 9:30 in the morning, I headed to Rivington House to do some volunteering. I have been volunteering here since 2006 and have grown to love/miss a handful of residents. Some have since past and others keep on fighting this awful disease. For the next 2 hours we forgot our problems and just focused on the present, making fun of each other and dancing to our favorite jams. I brought 2 rosaries from Christ the Redeemer (aka famous statue of Jesus in Rio de Janeiro) for very special residents and hope/pray it brings any kind of relief. I had the best time 2 hours at Rivington House and was especially touched when I saw the resident jump for joy when they saw me. The last time we spoke, I was off to Brasil and wouldn’t see them until TBD.

It was now noon and Claire and I were off to brunch but with a quick trip to 4th and Bowery. A good friend of mine, Arbi, was letting me crash at his 2nd apt in NYC. It is located in the best part of town, close to LES, SoHo, NoHo, Chinatown, the Village, etc.etc. I know this area very well, as it was the same block I was staying at for 4 weeks earlier this year. Arbi couldn’t join us for some brunch’ing at Dos because he was yet another finance friend of mine that had to work on Sunday. He gave me the keys, had a quick coffee, caught up and said Tchau. Thanks Arbi!
We all slowly started to arrive at Dos Caminos –SoHo and in the end the total count was a fierce 10. Effie/Marlon (ex PwC coworker and coned engineer), Erin (self employed), Kate/Darrick/Unidentified#1 (all MMC employees), Claire, Rebecca/Unidentified#2 (Fashion Week friend and her friend) and a cameo appearance from Ryan (Wharton grad) another finance friend who had to work on Sunday. As with any brunch at Dos Caminos, I had the best time. Good food, great drinks and best time catching up with friends. I am truly blessed to have you all in my life.

After brunch, I was in much need of some R&R, especially since I was still up from the day before traveling and what not. After my nap, I got ready for some much needed Hiro time. I went w/ my #1 club buddy and got home at around 3:30a.m. (only reason I know is unfortunately due to some drunk texting, teehee)

Day 2 – Monday
Got up at 7:00a.m. and went to the Bronx to take care of business (this is the main reason I came to USA). And after about 1hr, it was all over and I was good to go –YAY! I headed to Midtown and sat at Starbucks under 1166 (my ex-employer) and met with all my ex-coworkers while I waited for Maria to take me out to lunch. And boy was it lunch, she asked me where do I want to go and I was thinking pub, nearby café but instead blurted out the first that comes out of my mouth when someone within the midtown area asks, where do you want to go? I yell, Del Frisco’s, followed by but I can’t afford that, but to my surprise she says yes! YAY!!!

We had their famous crab cakes for app’s and I had their biz lunch (includes salad, filet and dessert). It was a heavy lunch, but thankfully was followed by another afternoon nap, teehee. I woke up just in time for Verlaine and headed over to Gerry’s work. We got to Verlaine a lil to early and so I thought what better place to wait than Sweet Sugar Sunshine (some version of this) bakery where they have NYC’s #1 cupcakes (for now at least). I do truly heart this place and their pistachio’s cupcake is – ME LIKEY LONG TIME!.

We headed back to Verlaine and slowly but surely the crew began arriving. Once again, I had the best time drinking, catching up and meeting new friends (mike’s new boo). And once again, I am just truly blessed to have the friends I have.

Day 3 – Tuesday
I woke up relatively early and headed out to Starbucks for some wifi’ing. It was the typical morning and nothing could have prepared me for what’s about to be written. I sat down at my usual spot and the store was relatively empty. One lady and one very young gentleman decided to 2 tables from me. He was definitely overdressed and I knew something wasn’t right (aka they weren’t old friends catching up) cuz he was a baby and she was in her 30’s. The next words out of her mouth were, “WHY MBA AND WHY COLUMBIA” :-O my mouth dropped. I was like, are you F’ING KIDDING ME. I am trying to not think about this and was doing it successfully and out of all the coffeeshops in NYC, you pick this one. So CLEARLY I dropped what I was doing, began fake typing and listened in. 3 main items he mentioned will stick w/ me forever. #1. Laid off in December #2. Was going to apply next year but due to current circumstances, doing it now #3 want to b CFO after graduation. I swear to you, if this lil kid is the reason why I wasn’t accepted then I’m glad the schools rejected me because I would have not had a good experience calling this guy a classmate.

It was time to head to the airport and I decided to go via MASS TRANS. It was going along very well until the A train just decided to stop for 30 minutes in Queens. This lead to me missing my flight in JFK, then taking a cab to LGA and by the grace of God I made the 4:30p.m. flight to MIA. I said grace because I was at the gate about to pick up my boarding pass when another flight to MIA was cancelled and everyone on that flight was transferred to my flight, meaning no way in hell I was getting on. But about 30 minutes prior to departure, the cancelled flight became un-cancelled and I literally took the last seat available. WHEW!

I got to Miami by 8p.m. and went directly to my favorite dive bar next to the airport, which we call the Columbian Restaurant. Another great night of catching up with old friends, family and seriously folks, I am truly blessed. Life may not be perfect and we all go thru our ups/downs but having good quality friends will make life a lil easier. After dive bar, the gays headed to SoBe and had a few rounds at Halo-hollerr.

Day 4 - Wednesday
Now it was time to say good-bye (for now) to USA. I hung out with the family all day and headed out to airport around 8p.m. And thanks to having family that works at airport, got VIP treatment with luggage check-in and met Claire at terminal E6. I decided to buy a JW-Green label to enjoy next week when I find out about Bschool. Good or Bad, I will b drinking quality Walker. At around 11pm, we were off to Rio de Janeiro, Brasil!

Around the world in 24hrs (Rio de Janeiro à NYC)

Saturday – 7:00a.m.
Well it’s kind of around the world, haha. I started my day anxiously awaiting my flight back to the states. I am so excited to see all my friends at the various meet up times/locations. I know I won’t get to see everyone, but the ones that matter will definitely be there, all others are “would have been nice”. There is one person that matters that has not replied to any of my communications. I wish I could say I am surprised, but I am not. He is just that kind of person and there is that blog dedicated to him that could have rubbed him the wrong way, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s taking some time off from me. So, I am sad but not surprised I won’t get to see him. One thing is for sure, after 3 emails and a voicemail (yes I went there) I will not be calling/texting him while I’m in NYC. Who knows, I might be pleasantly surprised and get a response from him but I ain’t holding my breath.

Saturday – 8:00a.m.
Last night it stormed cats and dogs and I was a little sad because I thought the rain would continue this morning, ruining my last tanning session Brasil. To my surprise, I woke up and it was as if it never happened but I’m no fool I know how unpredictable Rio’s weather can be. So I jumped in the shower, drank my cafezinho, got my rollerblades and stormed out of that apt!

Saturday – 10:00a.m.
Figured since I hadn’t seen 24 in over a month, I get pumped and write this blog ala Jack! I got on the train at 8:40a.m. and by 9:30a.m. I was at the beginning of Copacabana. The sky was clear and the sun was already burning hot. I walked over to the beach, which is about a 10 minute walk from the train station (for those future Rio travelers). Once I got to the beach side, I said goodbye to my havaianas and strapped on my skates en route to Leblon. I really do enjoy skating from Copacabana, through Ipanema and ending up in Leblon. It’s such a great view and soo many rest stops where I can get fresh coconut water and a nice shade, while I people watch!

Saturday – 12:00p.m.
After 2 great hours of going from one side of the beach and back, I decided it was time to head back. My body was definitely overheated and I unfortunately left my swim trunks home, because normally I would jump in the ocean to cool off (even though the water here is disgusting –compared to Recreio, Buzios, Angras…). Before I got to the train station, it is a tradition of mine to get Acai and an empanada.

Saturday – 2p.m.
Every time I head to the beach, you better believe it is followed with nap time. I think the sun puts my body through hell that it requires some down time. So I got an uninterrupted 1.5hrs of sleep. Awww

Saturday – 4p.m.
After finding out I didn’t have a ride to the airport, ughh. I got a taxi and headed to the airport. Normally I would be cutting it close, but if I have learned anything while in Rio is that nothing is ever ontime! LOL. I actually ended up getting there with no time to spare, no one was at the check-in counter, got to the security line and waited a lil. Once I cleared the machine I walked to my gate and walked right in. Now that’s what I call – THE WAY TO TRAVEL!

Saturday – 7p.m.
I got into Sao Paolo, Brasil and was asked to deboard the same exact plane that is taking me to NYC. Same flight #, same gate. Arghh, but it gave me some time for a quick snack because my body is now use to eating every 3’ish hrs. Got on the plane at 9p.m. and headed to NYC!

Sunday – 6a.m.
Landed on this beautiful, magnificent country I’d like to call good ole USofA. The customs line took forever but that’s just because I was sitting at the end of the plane and pretty much had the entire plane in front of me (US citizen’s of course). I was w/o a doubt better off than the visitor’s line, LOL. That was super long and moving at a glacial pace. So I got to the US custom’s lady and she said cool shirt, I went ahead and said thanks. Agreeing w/ everything she said cuz I just didn’t want to go into the “special” room. LOL. When she scanned my passport she said, how long have u been in brasil (with a tone of slight concern)? I told her, I left around Feb 4th, so a lil over a month. She said, what’s your occupation? I replied, UNEMPLOYED, to which she said “Good for you” and let me go. God I love how the economy sucks and I don’t have to back my story up any further!

Sunday – 8:30a.m.
So after MTA train delays, shuttle transfers, I finally got off the F train stop DELANCEY. The stop I called home for so many years and when I got out, I felt such a sense of disconnection. I’ve never felt this way so I’m continuing to process this. Now I’m at starbucks, wifi’ing away until I do some volunteering at Rivington House at 9:30a.m. then some brunch’ing w/ great friends at 1pm. Oh and for those following my bschool updates, today I found out I was yet again rejected from UMichigan (Ross). This is now the 4th rejection and I gotta be honest, it didn’t really have an impact on my feelings. I guess I’m becoming null to rejections, I just can’t wait until first week of April when I get the answers to all schools and I can finally start planning for PLAN B.

This is the end to an untypical 24hr day, from one side of the equator to the other.

Business School Update

Ahhhh, and so the parties/madness is slowly winding down. I’ve been entertaining guests from US since mid-February. Orlando works for Blackberry and was in Brazil on business, “coincidently” during Carnival. He’s actually a good friend of my friend, and we met here. He’s Cuban, from Miami and we grew up about 15 minutes apart. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, IT’S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL! We had a blast and were inseparable, if you’re reading this Chonga – Can’t wait to hang w/ you when I’m back in Miami! About 2 days after Orlando left, Talena came into town (almost on a whim). As soon as she got into town, we went to Recreio (a wonderful paradise right here in Rio, most tourist don’t know about this place). Once we got back, we went to the winner’s parade at the historic Sambodromo and have been busy site-seeing and enjoying Rio’s nightlife.

It is now Sunday, March 8 6PM and Talena left about 2 hours ago. It is the first time I have had to myself and one of the first things I want to do is update my “blog fans” with what’s been going on with my life. As most of you know, in early January I applied to business schools (nine to be exact) and slowly I am getting feedback. Unfortunately, but not surprising, I have gotten 3 rejections, 1 high unlikely, 1 not looking good, 1 “looking good” and still waiting for 3 other schools. Here’s the detail update: Emory, UVA and Yale have officially rejected me. I gave little to no effort on my UVA application, so I just can’t be surprise. I am however surprised from Emory/Yale’s decision. They were supposed to be my safety schools and as you can imagine my self esteem was pretty low when I got all 3 rejections. Most schools give a deadline on when they will send out their invitations to interview and for most schools if you don’t get one by the deadline, you’re not getting in. HBS and Stanford have both sent out the majority of the invitations and I have yet to receive one, so I’m pretty much banking on these will turn into rejections (both of which were programs I wanted to attend). Again feeling a lil sad, :-(

When Wharton’s invitation deadline approached, I was certain I would not get one and unlike Harvard/Stanford, Wharton sends out all invitation and if you don’t get on, you get a rejection letter. As you can imagine, I was checking/refreshing my emails every 5 minutes. It was already 5PM rio time and I had to meet Orlando for dinner, so I just assumed I wasn’t getting one and would see Rejection letter the following morning. I was talking with Orlando at dinner and telling him about the situation and he pulled out his blackberry and said, “let’s check your email and see once and for all, if it’s bad news we can drink your sorrows away”. While his intentions were kind, we had issues connecting on his blackberry and I decided to go to the nearby internet café. I signed onto gmail and my heart stopped when I read “Wharton Invitation to Interview”. I was just shocked and in disbelief that tears started falling from my eyes.

So here’s the deal with Wharton, I am not just applying for an MBA. I decided to apply to their dual degree program MBA/MA. The MA part will be in language (Portuguese) and they only accept approx 50 folks, whereas the MBA program accepts over 800. The fact that I was being considered for the dual degree program left me stumppyfied. Then I started asking my other friends, if they got an invitation to interview and none of them got one. I knew from the beginning that this would be a very competitive year and I honestly thought Wharton wouldn’t even be an option, but now I’m slowly realizing that YOU JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT ADMISSIONS COMMITTEE IS THINKING.

On the week of March 2, I had both my Lauder and Wharton interview (unfortunately separately, which meant wearing suits 2x in Rio’s HOT weather). The Lauder interview left me confused and I just don’t know if I provided the information he wanted. You know how sometimes you leave an interview feeling good or bad? I left this interview just confused, so we’ll see the end results. As for my Wharton interview, I TOTALLY NAILED IT! It’s just nice to hear the interviewer say, “Well I got what I needed, you are a strong candidate….” Now if only the admission’s decision were based on interview alone, I know I got in. But alas, I spoke from an ex-admin person and the process goes as such: After interview, the admission committee meets again and re-evaluates my candidacy. I think they use the information from the interview to cross reference my app and then make a decision, so basically what I’m saying is I got a 50/50 chance of getting in. So while I am still scared I won’t get in, “I am happy to have been nominated…” LOL.

U-Michigan will release their decision on March 15. UNC on March 23 and NYU has not provided any indications. As for Wharton, I think their deadline to make decisions is March 27, but I really would like to know earlier (good/bad). I just hate waiting and waiting and waiting and then getting a HNJN! But alas, I will have a very busy next 3 weeks with the nonprofit and my mini-trip to NYC/Miami next weekend. Yeah, I have to go take care of something in NYC and will get there early Sunday morning, 3/15. I leave NYC the following Tuesday, 3/17 to Miami for one night and back to Rio on 3/18 with Claire who’s also helping out with the NGO. I feel like I’m traveling like a total ROCKSTAR, except I’m in coach-LOL.

Say Goodbye

After listen to Kelly's song, I found it ironic that I went to Chris Brown's "Say Goodbye". I've always listen to this song when I was saying goodbye to someone, whether due to death or simply because we were no longer friends. I never thought of this song as the break-up of a 2 lovers. This is definitely the song I dedicate to the "cuban" when I left NYC. Some would say, why are you bring up someone you said you ended the relationship with. Well, not sure many know this , but I just bought a ticket to NYC & Miami in 2weeks. I have to take care of something in NYC and will of course try to see as many friends as possible. I still consider the cuban a friend and hope it will remain forever. But alas, who knows what will happen in 2 weeks, if I'll get to see him at all (he's like that sometimes, but I've learned to accept him for who he is). Well here's another great song for those that are in the midst of breaking up with someone who has/had a piece of your heart.

"Say Goodbye"

Look we gotta talk
Dang I know
I know it's just
It's just...
Some things I gotta get of my chest alright....
Yeahhhh...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa...
Listen..

Baby come here and sit down, let's talk
I got a lot to say so I guess I'll start by
Saying that I love you,
But you know, this thing ain't been
No walk in the park for us
I swear it'll only take a minute
You'll understand when I finish, yeah
And I don't wanna see you cry
But I don't wanna be the one to tell you a lie so

[Hook]
How do you let it go? When you,
You just don't know? What's on,
The other side of the door
When you're walking out, talk about it
Everything I tried to remember to say
Just went out my head
So I'ma do the best I can to get you to understand
'cause I know

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

Girl I know your heart is breaking
And a thousand times I
Found myself asking, "Why? Why?"
Why am I taking so long to say this?
But trust me, girl I never
Meant to crush your world
And I never
Thought I would see the day we grew apart
And I wanna know

[Hook]
How do you let it go? When you,
You just don't know? What's on,
The other side of the door
When you're walking out, talk about it
Girl I hope you understand
What I'm tryna say.
We just can't go on
Pretending that we get along
Girl how you not gonna see it?

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it's not you it's me.
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

Listen to your heart
Girl you know,
We should be apart, baby I
I just can't do it
I, I just can't do it
Listen to your heart
Girl you know,
We should be apart, baby I
I just can't do it
And sometimes it makes me wanna cry
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh [4x]
Do you hear me crying?
Oh, oh, oh [4x]

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it's not you it's me.
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way I once felt about you
Girl it's not you it's me.
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

Where is your heart?

So the party is finally winding down and I'm starting to reflect on 2008 and a lil on 2009. I was listening to Kelly Clarkson and this is a great song. It was definately reflective on how I felt about the "Cuban" in 2008. And for those that are up to date on my blogs, we all know that boat has shipped but this song would have nice to listen to in 2008. I know it's old but I never took the time to listen to the words. Let's take a read: "Where Is Your Heart?"

I don't believe
In the smile that you leave
When you walk away
And say goodbye
Well I don't expect
The world to move underneath me
But for God's sake
Could you try?
I know that you're true to me
You're always there
You say you care
I know that you want to be mine

Where is your heart?
'Cause I don't really feel you
Where is your heart?
What I really want is to believe you
Is it so hard
To give me what I need?
I want your heart to bleed
That's all I'm asking for
Oh, where is your heart?

I don't understand
Your love is so cold
It's always me that's reaching out
For your hand
And I've always dreamed
That love would be effortless
Like a petal fallin' to the ground
A dreamer followin' his dream

Where is your heart?
'Cause I don't really feel you
Where is your heart?
What I really want is to believe you
Is it so hard
To give me what I need?
I want your heart to bleed
And that's all I'm asking for
Oh, where is your heart?

It seems so much is left unsaid
So much is left unsaid
But you can say anything
Oh, anytime you need
Baby, it's just you and me
Oh yeah

I know that you're true to me
You're always there
You say you care
I know that you want to be mine

Where is your heart?
'Cause I don't really feel you
Where is your heart?
What I really want is to believe you
Is it so hard
To give me what I need?
I want your heart to bleed
That's all I'm asking for
Oh yeah

Where is your heart?
'Cause I don't really feel you
Where is your heart?
What I really want is to believe you
Is it so hard
To give me what I need?
I want your heart to bleed
And that's all I'm asking for
Where is your heart?
Where is your heart?
Where is your heart?
Where is your heart?
--The end.