Network

On Day 2 of my stay in Miami, I decided to have another relaxing day. I just found out Matt (a good friend from NYC) is coming on Thursday for a few days and let's just say when you put the both of us together, we become a HOT MESS! In preparation, I need to rest my body (especially my liver), Yayyy I can't wait!

Today, I decided to do my annual spring cleaning to my facebook friends list. After only about 30 minutes, I realized I didn't have much "trash" to take out. I was a little shocked/surprised that I really did know over 500 folks. I'm not saying we're all BFF's but they are all definitely "friends" I would send an email and expect a response. Of course there were the handful of those that were just too cute to take off, what can I say - I'm human! LOL

This brings me to the topic of the day "Network". Instead of just talking about how important it is to have a network, I'm going to discuss the series of events that occurred to me from the day I was laid off.

As of mid-November 2008, I was unemployed. Unlike most of my friends around the country, I was laid-off with compensation and medical insurance. This layer of security provided me an opportunity to not seek employment with urgency. I was in the middle of applying to b-school and decided to give this my undivided attention. My lease was luckily over in November and so I decided to move back home at the end of the month (Thanksgiving). Before leaving NYC, I decided to take advantage of Philly's close proximity and went for a day visit at Wharton's MBA campus. I decided to call my old friend Kim and asked if I could crash at her place for a night. I was not only received with warm/open hands, I got to catch up with an old friend of mine. Where did I meet Kim? That's an easy one, VOLUNTEERING! We met at Rivington House and became instant BFF's. In a city of over 8 million people, most with cold hearts, it is easy to spot someone with a beautiful heart. I have found that people are easier to spot when you volunteer (so if any NYC'ers are reading this, go out and volunteer (http://www.nycares.org/)! Kim is just an amazing person and I am blessed to have her in my life. I had a great visit in Philly and was pleasantly surprised at what Kim had to tell me (just part of her new journey in grad school). Good luck Kim, u know I got your back!

Before leaving NYC, I booked my flight to Ann Arbor, Michigan, for a 3 day conference at Ross's School of Business. I was desperately looking to save money and not spend $500 in hotel cost, but realized I did not know anyone in Ann Arbor. I have 2 friends in Detroit, but I did not want to commute. I was talking to my old/best friend Talena about this dilemma and she said, she'll ask her BFF in Ann Arbor if she'd mind having me over. Within days, I got clearance and took Talena's friend, Amy's, offer. This was kind of weird because I just did not know this person, a complete stranger, and she's letting me crash at her place. But I was desperate and went along with it. I met Amy at her job, Medstat, and went through the famous 6-degrees of separation experiment. Apparently she was talking to her coworkers on her way down, to give me her keys, and she mentioned my name, Mercer, and one of them said, "I Know him!". Indeed he did, he worked on a number of accounts that I lead and I thoroughly enjoyed working with him. IT'S A SMALL WORLD FOLKS! By the end of the weekend, I made a new friend (Amy, I had a blast and can't wait to hang w/ you soon!). Amy also told me that her coworker said, if I were to ever seek employment in Ann Arbor, he'd have a position for me. It's a nice feeling inside to know you work was valued and heck you just never know when our paths will cross.

Prior to leaving to Michigan, I decided I was not getting any studying/writing down in Miami because I was just having WAY TOO much fun. Oh how I've missed this city! So I emailed my good friend Dewon, who lives in San Francisco, and asked him if I could apt-sit while he was away visiting his family (for 4 weeks). How did I meet Dewon? One day, while I was working at PwC, I was looking at the LGBT intranet and noticed a posting saying, "hey guys I just moved to NYC from South Africa and looking to meet new friends?" I immediately emailed him and later that day we went for the personalized Melvin tour of Chelsea. Ever since that day, we became BFF's. There were some big fights and interestingly enough, he was the only one that survived the "YOU ARE DEAD TO ME" crash of 2007. Which we haven't fully recovered from, but alas are moving towards the right direction. On the second week of December, I moved (yet again) to San Francisco and got to hang with Dewon for a few days before he left to SA. I also got to meet his new BF and was soo happy he got to meet such a cool kat. (Congrats and Good luck with him, Dewon!) I also got to hang with Tom (my ex roommate, which I met via CL) and his new GF, both of which are Harvard Business School grads. They took time (they both didn't have) to review my essays I was submitting to Harvard and gave me their suggestions. I could not thank them enough for doing this, but more importantly they both sat me down and strongly suggested I apply to Stanford. At the time, I was already applying to 8 Bschools and just didn't want to add another one to the mix, but I respect both of them enough and decided to add another one. After researching Stanford, I could not thank them enough because I learned that I am definitely a much better fit at Stanford. Alas, we'll see what Stanford thinks in the next coming weeks. I spent the next few weeks reflecting and enjoying the few days of great weather San Francisco had to offer. FYI- It rains a lot in December/January!

On XMas week, I decided I missed my family/friends too much and wanted to move to either LA, Miami or NYC. Since it only cost $125 one way to NYC, that became my first choice. After making a few calls, I found 3 temporary housing arrangements in NYC. The first few days, I got to stay in Kelley's phat crib in the West Village, then a few days with Alanys in the Bronx, right next to Yankees Stadium, and the remainder at Roman's apartment in the heart of the East Village (Bowery/4th street!). I mean seriously folks, how amazing are these locations.

How did I meet Kelley? I met Kelley through Erin, her childhood friend. Erin answered my online ad seeking help for my first fundraiser. Erin is an event planner, self employed, and was an angel sent from God because I really needed her help at this event. Kelley just moved to NYC about a year ago and went with Erin to Lauren's holiday party in 2007, which I was allegedly dancing the night away (teehee). Ever since that weekend, Kelley and I became good friends and quite honestly, I wasn't expecting her to extend her home the way she did. It was a nice and pleasant surprise. Thanks Kelley, you ROCK! The day before New Years Eve, I moved to Alany's apt for a few days.

How did I meet Alanys? For the my advid blog readers, he's potential #2. But this won't be about relationship Alanys, instead it'll be about friendship Alanys. I met him about a year ago, 1/2/08 to be exact and we dated for a few weeks. He said, he's not looking for a relationship but would like a friendship. Those are not words anyone wants to hear from someone you're dating, but alas I valued his honesty and decided to try the friendship thing. Throughout the year, he showed me great respect, went above and beyond the call of duty and I could not have asked for a better friend. Despite the constant flirting, it has been a pleasure meeting Alanys and look forward to what the future has in store for us. As his guest, I received nothing short of red carpet accommodations. He was always asking me if I needed anything, he cooked dinner on numerous occasions and just made me feel at home (especially with those 10p.m. Cuban coffee-yumm!!). He even took me out to lunch on the day I was leaving and carried my bags to the subway station.. Bro, you mean the world to me and I want to thank you for your hospitality!
Off I go to Roma's crib.

How did I meet Roman? Roman is one of my BFF's boyfriend and we became close from the countless nights at clubs in Queen's and Washington Heights. Roman is what you would call a late-gay. He did the straight life up until his 40's, did the wife, 2 kids and finally came out (mostly to himself, his family doesn't know). And so he has a lot of club nights to catch up on, but the main reason why I enjoy going out with him is because he just has this passion for life. And when he goes to the clubs, he's constantly dancing and making me laugh. Oh Roman, how much I have missed you! As soon as I got to Roman's apartment, he directed me to his room and I was confused. I'm like, why am I in your room? I can sleep in the couch. He said, nonsense you take my bed and I get the couch. I insisted and lost the battle. For the next 3 weeks, I slept comfortably and got a lot accomplished with my b-school apps. Especially since I didn't have to take mass transit anywhere, he lives off Bowery and 4th street. I just walked everywhere!

Aside from my housing accommodations, I can't thank my friends enough for taking time out of their busy schedule to read my 1000000 essays I had to write. Kate Genovese, ex coworker that tells it like it is and is hosting 3 of my luggages (thanks kate!). Claire Coveney, met via volunteering and is just another awesome person with a really cool heart! Talena Hunt, college bud and my future ex-wife/mother of my children-LOL. Ryan Penn, ex-coworker, Wharton alum and now NYC resident. Stephanie Chin, met via nonprofit channel and current Emory JD/MBA student. Jennifer Jil, met via other nonprofit and current NYU Student.

Last but not least, thanks to the Ibrahim's for putting me up in Boston while I visited Harvard and the Mintz while I visited UNC-Chapel Hill.

I can honestly say that I am truly blessed to have met the people I have. The one thing I do want to say for those that are out to just meet people. Take time to foster the relationships you make. These days, it isn't enough to just meet people. People aren't stupid and can tell when they are just being used. Take time to connect and bond with them (period).